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Wednesday, January 12, 2011

What is Wrong With You

I'm gonna do a PROPS and SLOPS from the waterpark today. It was. Interesting.

PROPS:

The lifeguard that flipped me over as I was trying to get into my tube.

This may not seem like a prop worthy moment, maybe even straight douchey. However it was really fucking funny, and the lifeguard had a sick read that I wasn't a brat that would complain a bunch. ALL IN GOOD FUN.

The birds, oh god the birds.

Multiple people left their food to grab condiments, which is retarded because all the condiments are on the tables, and CLOUDS OF BIRDS WOULD DESCEND ON THE FOOD. It got TORE UP. It was redic status. So many fucking birds, so many ruined sammiches.

SLOPS:

THE WIND RUINING EVERYONES FUN. FUCKING WINDY AS THE DICKENS.

The entitled Jew.

Nobody cares how bored you are. There are like 2 fucking rules at the waterpark, it's not hard to follow them. I know you have a trust fund, but that doesn't make the world revolve around you. Don't be such an ass to the life guards that are just trying to do their jobs, forced to watch douches like you all day.

The fucking Eastern European kid.

He went down the waterslide after me, and in the splash pool he took a bunch of water into his mouth and spit it at me. "Oh, wow, gross." I exclaimed in disgust. Obviously his response was to reload, and spit at me again with a big shit eating grin on face. I just had to walk away because what the fucking fuck. Honestly, Eastern Europe, this is why everyone thinks you are dirty. BECAUSE YOU FUCKING ARE.

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